Cultivating an attitude of gratitude in today's world of instant gratification is tough for adults and children alike. Below is how our family is trying to push back those feelings of entitlement.
Books:
In addition to the Bible, I've had two books that have helped me to live life with a more grateful spirit:
1) Several years ago, I had a wonderful book recommended to me: The Prayer That Changes Everything Book of Prayers: The Hidden Power of Praising God by Stormie Omartian. The book targets specific times that are tough in a person's life and provides guided prayers of praise and thankfulness during those tough times. I was glad to have the book on hand through my miscarriage.
2) One Thousand Gifts: A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are by Ann Voskamp.
This book details Ann's inner thought life as she grapples with the need for thankfulness in everyday life and in times of tragedy. Her ministry offers some daily prompts to help others find things big and small, dazzling and mundane to be thankful for. Check out the free tools here: http://www.aholyexperience.com/free-tools-for-you/
Children:
Over the past few months, I have seen the need for our children to have a spirit of thankfulness, especially our five year old who can have a critical and sour disposition at times. So far, our three year old seems to be enamored with life and prayers of thankfulness tumble off of her lips throughout the day. In an effort to encourage thankfulness among ALL family members, every night before bed, we each take a turn saying "I am thankful for..." and list the things we are thankful for that day. We make a strong daily effort to have our children say "thank you" for common courtesies, meals, sharing, etc. We also ask our children to thank their various teachers and coaches at the end of each class/practice/game, and we make a lot of thank you cards for others in our lives. We know that God desires us to live a life of gratitude and that a spirit of gratitude will lead to more joy in the lives of our children.
Marriage:
Early on, our marriage was tanking fast. We were barely holding on to "until death do us part." Believing in the Biblical view of marriage, we kept fighting the good fight, going to marriage counselors and a marriage retreat. The biggest thing God used to change our marriage was the following piece of advice, "Each night, sit down with your spouse, and thank them for (at least) one thing they did that day." It could be as simple as "Thank you for taking a shower today" or something more deep such as "Thank you for taking my feelings into consideration before making weekend plans." Whoa! Sounds simple, but if you are in a hard spot in your marriage, it can be a tough task. We found that the need to find one thing every day to thank each other for had us looking for good things throughout the day. We now say "thank you" throughout the day for one another - in person, text, phone call, notes, etc. God turned our marriage around using gratitude.
You would think with all of this, thankfulness would come easy. Unfortunately, it does not. That inner sin nature makes each of us feel so entitled that our thought life can look like, "we deserve this, of course they should do it for us, it's their job." It is a battle that must be fought daily in every area of our life.
I encourage you to take some steps to add thankfulness into your daily routine. Avoid plans so grandiose that follow through will be difficult. Start with baby steps. Tell that person at your office you can't stand something you appreciate them for - are they always on time, do they excel at customer service, do they remember to wear their badge every day, do they look professional, do they have a spirit of persistence, are they quick with a smile? Be careful to keep your thoughts out of the negative range. Avoid "always" and "never" statements.
When you start to feel down, start thanking God for the blessings in your life.
When stressful thoughts are keeping you from sleeping at night, start thanking God for the good things in life.
It can be tough, but start with the simple stuff.
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